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But if a guy says he wants someone smart who can be his best friend, you can bet he's put some thought into what kind of person he wants and is looking for something more long-term." Just like a man who is clear about his expectations in a relationship, a man who mentions things that are important to him, like his career and family, is showing you right away that he's either ready to settle down or sees that in his future.
He wants you to know from the get-go what's important in his life, and that if you hit it off, you'll be fitting in amongst those other priorities as well.
Megan Murray, senior content strategist and editor-in-chief at Zoosk, told me, "The more a guy invests in his profile ― he adds good photos, his description is filled out, or he's verified his profile using whatever features the site or app you're on has available ― the more invested he is in finding someone who's a good fit for him." She went on to add that people who have more photos tend to spend more time on the site getting to know people, adding, "If someone has just one photo, they just aren't putting as much effort into things." Licensed clinical psychologist Erika Martinez agreed.
She told me, "The best gauge of [whether a man will be engaging on a date] is how attentive he is in completing his profile and the quality of the responses he provides.
Scott Valdez, the founder of Vi DA (Virtual Dating Assistants) told me, "A guy who is looking to commit will put more effort into the image he's presenting on the dating app.
If he's highlighting things like his career and the importance of family in his profile — and his photos don't make you cringe — that's a good sign he's boyfriend material." Everyone wants to put their best foot forward, especially when it comes to dating, but if his profile is full of his accomplishments and everything he loves about himself, it might be a red flag.
"It also shows that they are more concerned with their physical appearance than other aspects of their personality." Reddle agreed, adding, "If a guy is showing off his abs in every photo there is a possibility that besides his dieting and gym life you, will have nothing to talk about." Mary T.
Sambrosky, the founder and president of the dating and relationship coaching site Be Plus One, took it a step further.
"They're literally invested in finding the right person." It makes sense. "It amazes me how many women don't take that seriously or think that he's just saying that but will change his mind," she said. While Murray said this is typically truer of older men, it isn't limited to them.
"A lot of guys who are on dating apps looking for a more serious relationship will just come out and say it," she told me.
All of the experts I spoke with were quick to point out that what makes someone boyfriend material can mean a lot of different things, depending on the type of boyfriend you're looking for or relationship you're looking to have.
Consider each of these suggestions in combination with your own deal breakers and must-haves to help inform your dating choices.
Even if you go on a first date, you might decide he isn't worth a second date.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating